the next time...

• i post, i'll be a mom.
• i bathe in my bathtub, my tummy will no longer hold a baby.
• i sit at this table, my family will be 3...no longer 2.
• any of my friends or family see me, they won't really see me...they'll only have eyes for my son.
• michael and i get in the car together, it will be the last time we get in alone...for a long, long time.
• i eat something, it will be because i've just been through labor and delivered a child. an actual human child. mine and michael's child. whoa.
• my husband holds a baby, it will be his own. finally. and i will cry.
• we sleep in our bed, after tonight, a baby will sleep in the room with us.
• i fall deeply in love...will be some time tomorrow...

baby boy-
daddy and i have waited a long time for you. we are anxious to meet you and hold you and love you. we are praying for your safe arrival tomorrow. be careful as you make your way here. i will do everything within my power to make sure it's as easy as possible for you. :) once you're here, our lives will be like nothing we've ever imagined. we love you so very much. see you tomorrow!
-mama

what's-his-name choices

as you well remember, we haven't had the best luck with choosing names for baby boy in the past, oh...39 weeks or so. :)

a few weeks ago, michael and i decided we would each choose 5 names and then narrow down a list from there. we've also chosen that we won't finally decide on his name until we meet him. i mean, we've waited this long, what's a few more days?

so, i think we have a list of 4 to choose from. feel free to give your opinions, as long as none of them are negative...:)

michael daniel jules kotze junior - MDJK

jackson david jules kotze - JDJK

nathan daniel jules kotze - NDJK

luke henry jules kotze - LHJK

quotes to make the day

• "still at a one and 70%. i'm surprised you haven't made any progress at all..." -doctor
  
• "shall we schedule an induction for next tuesday?" -doctor
  
• "is baby boy getting here this week?" "so they're going to induce you next tuesday?" -uncle mattie
• "now you can say your little boy will be here no later than tuesday! which just stinks for us here. :(" -crystal
• "ahh shucks!" -amy
• "come on baby come on!" - amy
• "baby o baby...where o where can you be?" -pa
• "come to see you pa...right now." -pa
• "come on baby. come on." -pa

two nights in a row, i've dreamt i was in labor. each time i had a contraction in my dream, i woke up. i tried to concentrate to see if i was really in pain, and i honestly thought i was. when i finally got up in the morning, it felt like something i could have imagined. could i have been too groggy and made up the pain? i don't think so.

at our appt today i told the doctor that the baby had seemed to slow down in the past couple of days. he's still getting all of his movements in during the 2 hour allotment, he's just much more quiet than normal. to make sure everything was fine, she put me in a recliner and plugged me onto the fetal monitor. we measured the baby's heartbeat and my contractions for about 45 minutes. i was fairly uncomfortable in the room. i had several big-time contractions in my back and was becoming increasingly uncomfortable and irritable.

when the doc finally came in to check she said the baby looked great and had "woken up". she followed that up with, "you've been having contractions, mama. have you felt those?" uh...yeah. she said i could go into labor before tuesday, after all, but made sure our induction was still scheduled for tuesday morning, august 18th, 7am. all that means...

"well, now we know no later than a week!! :)" -seph